These days I seem to live in Ephesians and Paul has somewhat become my wing man and a little Locked Away from Adam Levine and R. City didn't hurt the writing process today either. Still blows me away how God works sometimes.
Well, I have been studying spiritual warfare and prayer for the past 6 months now, I seem to always find my way back to Ephesians and the letters of Paul. In these letters is a root, this root has to find its way into deep soil within your spirit, this is a root that will change you, your worship, and how you live your life. Oh and there is Paul, oh how I love Paul, I would have loved to hear him speak, the wisdom on his tongue, the joy that spilled from his lips when he spoke of God, the passion in his eyes as he shared all he had seen, experienced and all the truth that had been revealed to him, the tone and dialect of his voice as he shared and fought for the Kingdom of God. Getting to know Paul has given me a new definition, a new meaning when I ask God to empty me of me and to fill me with His Spirit. I want to sit at Paul's feet as he teaches, I want to know God like Paul knew God!! I want to fight for the Kingdom as he did, where it matters. I no longer want my life to be my own. I have learned what I'm fighting, who I'm fighting, I have witnessed the strategic battle plan forged against me, I know deception, misdirection, I can recognize a lie before it fully rolls off of a tongue and I am now watching as the fiery arrows are fired toward my children because they can no longer penetrate the Armor my God has given me. I can see past flesh and blood to where the threat really lies, and how desperate and petty the enemy can become. I have learned how to pray fervently and with purpose, I have gained an intimacy with God that cant fully be expressed in words. I have experienced and seen how God has gone before me, how he has and is making good of all that was meant to destroy me.
I do not hold the vocabulary to adequately describe the peace you feel inside yourself when in the midst of the battlefield, flaming arrows falling all around, as you stand in the heart of the attempts of the enemy to set fire and destroy all you hold dear; what it feels like to stand still with peace, to press forward with faith and to know your God will and is fighting for you and has gone before you making your way. To get glimpses of how this moment right now no matter what it is, is no surprise to God is breathtaking. He has already been here, He has prepared me and you for right now and given us every weapon needed to victoriously stand as Hell rages around us. The peace... I cant even begin to explain, yes some days are hard especially when the attacks are aimed towards those I hold dearest, when the attention is turned from breaking me down to breaking them down..to break me down. Its hard not to take it into my own hands, to fight the flesh and bones the enemy is using. As the emotions swirl inside me, when I am becoming distracted, in that moment comes a flood of peace that surpasses all and in those moments I HAVE TO CHOOSE to have faith and stand, no matter what the terrain ahead of me looks like, to fight Gods way, to be still and let things unfold in Gods time or allow the enemy to poison my heart, my mind, my spirit, with fear, worry, bitterness, anger, regret and insecurity. I am and choose to be a Ride or Die kinda girl, things don't always look as Id like them to and rarely go as I may have planned but I have truly learned the power and peace in being content in all circumstances and where Paul was coming from. This is a daily battle and I will admit there are days I lose some ground and fall to my flesh. I do have a secret something personalized for me to go along with my Armor God has given me and that Paul has taught me to use.
Its my shades...now hold up.. every ride or die chick has to have a sick pair of shades its a trademark...come on now!!
When it gets tough, when I don't understand, when its hard, I pray for God to shade my eyes; I ask Him to block out all that does not serve His purpose, everything that is only meant to distract me, steal my focus and derail all God has for me. My God tinted glasses reminds me that it is not about what I see but what God sees. It allows me to see past what is blinding me at the moment, to see how God has gone before me and what lies just beyond the fire, even if I cant see past the flames at the moment I know my future is there because my God promised. My shades also protect and guard me for when the world cuts too deep and the pain will show in my eyes, when I am broken and the tears will surely fall; He covers my eyes so the world doesn't see me cry, He covers my weakness with His strength and none are the wiser. My God tinted glasses allow me to see the world different because I am choosing to be different, I am choosing to see Gods way. Like Paul, for me... to live is Christ but to die is gain...that is my choice. I will have faith in the truth and promise that is God, through all that I face in this world I will choose to look through Gods eyes to see as He sees, for my purpose to be His purpose, to not see and live in what lies in front of me but to see past this life to what is ahead of me and bigger than me. I know who I am riding with and what I am dying to and for, do you?
Do you really ride with HIM, would you really die for HIM!!
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